The Top 20 Lessons I’ve Learned From Marriage:
(in no particular order…)
- It’s important to apologize, even when you don’t believe you did anything wrong. What you did do is hurt the one you love, which is enough to apologize for.
- Unconditionally love your spouse. It’s too easy to leave a marriage when it’s based on conditions.
- Appreciate the differences. Like likes like, but there is a reason that God made opposites attract.
- Learn ways to make your spouse feel loved. It may not be the same ways that you feel love or naturally express it.
- Everyone is predictable. Accept and adjust to your spouse’s predictable behaviors and emotions, rather than try to change them.
- Allow breathing room for growth in one another. People change as life happens, but the core values of who they are will always remain.
- Being happy is an inside job. Do not make it your spouse’s problem.
- Do not set your spouse up to fail. Be their rock, don’t beat them with it.
- Always discuss expectations. It’s too easy to fail when you can’t see the target (or are unaware that it’s even there.)
- Appreciate and express appreciation for one another.
- Forgive. If there is no reason your spouse would want to intentionally hurt you, there is also no reason to ponder on the pain.
- Sometimes, a simple hug will fix anything.
- Always respect your spouse. It’s very difficult to regain respect once it is lost.
- Keep things in perspective. It’s a waste of energy to make big issues out of little annoyances.
- Never blame your spouse. It’s usually not your spouse that you are frustrated with, but the situation that you are both in. Work together to work it out.
- Listen. It’s more important than your opinion.
- No marriage is perfect, despite what you see in the media.
- It’s okay to agree to disagree.
- Be grateful. You could lose what you love in the blink of an eye.
- Always focus on what you can contribute to your marriage, not what you take away from it.
Happy 11th Anniversary, Craig.
I love you.